It made me laugh earlier that, in a photoshoot at Twitter’s swanky new offices, they chose to include a very unconvincing photograph of a woman doing a bit of DJ-ing, supposedly because all hip & happening internet corperations like Twitter have a DJ booth in the office, positioned somewhere between the tapas dispenser, Tassimo cofffee machine and ipod recycling bin.
Gosh, it’s obviously like one long party working at Twitter, it must be a treat to work amongst a real mix of trendy, pioneering web marketing strategists, next-generation web 2.0 coders and blue sky thinking project managers who have clearly harnessed their work/life balance to the max.
Of course, the most likely explanation behind this perculiar photo is that she’s gone & had a recording from a conference about HTML Web Standards pressed onto a 12″ and is blasting it through the office for all her nerdy computer chums….
It strikes me that some people still think there’s nothing cooler than being a DJ. I can think a billion reasons why DJ-ing really isn’t that cool, for instance:
1. On a Saturday night, you’re stood behind two turntables playing records for hours on end, whilst your mates are drinking, having fun, and meeting interesting people.
2. You’re spending hundreds of pounds on vinyl & CDs whilst your non-DJ friends can spend it on clothes, therefore ensuring that they always look more presentable than you.
3. You will never earn enough money from DJing to cover all the money you’ve spent on records no-one’s ever heard of.
4. All the big tunes you’ve bought recently – no-one’s ever heard of them.
5. All your “prized possession”, “Limited Edition”, “Rare Pressing”, “Desert Island Discs” – no one’s ever heard of them and no-one cares.
6. No karaoke machine will ever have that cool record you bought – and even if they did, your mates won’t sing along or enjoy it, because you’re the only one that knows it.
7. Your prized record collection will be worth next to nothing by the time you find yourself forced to sell it due to lack of space / lack of cash / emerging offspring.
8. Records don’t fit through your letterbox, you’re never in when the postman comes to get them, and they’re about 10 times as expensive as a download and take a 1,000 times longer to arrive.
9. Regardless of how underground you think you might be, you can guarantee some berk will ask you if you have any U2 in your box.
Now, admittedly, that’s not a billion reasons; in fact it’s only nine. However, I’ve decided that neither you nor I would have the patience to whittle through the remaining 999,999,999,991 other reasons.